Many people say they are in love no matter if they feel that he or she is the one or not, they are completely smitten at the sight of their infatuation. But, may I humbly submit my perspective; The reason why the fantasy is often better than the reality is not that the person you wanted Sucks, it’s because the thing that you were Crazy in love over was the Thought of Love instead of the actual act of love.
Case in point, let's say you have a crush on David from the mailroom. He’s tall dark and fine as hell. He makes your heart flutter and butterflies roll in your stomach. He is the epitome of everything you could ever want in a man and you would be ready willing and able to sign his last name as yours tomorrow because “he so fine!” You are already planning your life with him but you know nothing about him. This is what catches a lot of my ladies up. Likewise, the fellas fall into this as well but, I am focused more on the ladies this time. This came from one of my followers who asked me “MnD how do I approach my 'office bae' to make him my real bae.” While I know she was joking with me there is a certain level of truth to her outcry. Let’s get back to... we will refer to him as “Office Bae” for now.
First thing First, we cannot mistake infatuation for love, they are very different things. For example, Infatuation is usually known as the crushing through the new love phase where the person can do no wrong, and everything they do is cute. Love, however, is when the person can do something stupid that would normally piss you off but you can see past it because you are deeply emotionally connected to him or her. We could add in lust but I'm trying to keep this readable. Men experience all of this as well by the way however, due to popular societal standards men tend to not let it be seen as much, that they are willing to follow her like a puppy and she is the center of her universe for fear of ridicule of their peers but that a whole different post!
With that said, let’s get back to the mailroom. Whether you are willing to go out for drinks or just flirt around the office, you have to get to know this person first. Ask questions that really open up the conversation and you may be surprised as to what comes of it. WAKE UP from the dream and welcome the reality and you can make it happen. The bottom line here is this, take the time to get to know the object of your affection before you call yourself in love.
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Just my Modern Perspective
As Always
You hit it right on the nail here! Very relatable examples. Many of us have set ourselves up for failure by confusing love for infatuation. I think when people are searching for the wrong things out of relationships that's when they easily fool themselves thinking they in love when it isn't anything but infatuation.